![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Right, and be completely proficient in it by the time we go to Antiva.
Or I could ask for help, which I did.
I'm not completely helpless, I've been training in staves for over a year. But I'm-- ..I'm not stupid enough to be uncautious.
I'm not completely helpless, I've been training in staves for over a year. But I'm-- ..I'm not stupid enough to be uncautious.
No, of course not, but--
[he's starting to get tripped up now, his thoughts moving too quickly for his mouth.]
--but-- I’m, I’m a scribe. I panic in a real fight. Whether someone wants to kill me or— or I’m just in the way of them trying to kill you, I….
[He shrugs helplessly at his desk.]
I don’t know, she asked. I assumed she meant it. Any magic I cast would probably just piss off an actual assassin.
[he's starting to get tripped up now, his thoughts moving too quickly for his mouth.]
--but-- I’m, I’m a scribe. I panic in a real fight. Whether someone wants to kill me or— or I’m just in the way of them trying to kill you, I….
[He shrugs helplessly at his desk.]
I don’t know, she asked. I assumed she meant it. Any magic I cast would probably just piss off an actual assassin.
Edited (tone felt wrong!!) 2022-03-31 06:50 (UTC)
[A long pause. Then, carefully,]
Do you want me to retract the request?
Do you want me to retract the request?
[His shoulders are hunched, his posture tense. But he nods, once, staring into the middle distance.]
No.
[Benedict shakes his head without looking at Byerly.]
I'll handle it.
[Benedict shakes his head without looking at Byerly.]
I'll handle it.
[Immediately filled with far too many ideas for what he could snap back in response, Benedict opts for none of them, forcing himself to think about it and, grudgingly, realize that Byerly has a point.
Ugh.]
I know, [is all he allows himself to say.]
Ugh.]
I know, [is all he allows himself to say.]
You won't have to look after me.
[He'll see to it, one way or another. If only being a mage were the free pass some seem to think it is.]
[He'll see to it, one way or another. If only being a mage were the free pass some seem to think it is.]
[Rather than answer, Benedict holds his hands out on either side in a frustrated, shrug-like gesture. What can he even say that won't launch this circular conversation back from its beginning?]
All right, [he finally concedes, at a loss otherwise, and turns back to his writing. Please, Maker, let him just finish the day's work and get out of here.]
All right, [he finally concedes, at a loss otherwise, and turns back to his writing. Please, Maker, let him just finish the day's work and get out of here.]
I…
[cautiously,]
think perhaps I should, yes.
[cautiously,]
think perhaps I should, yes.
[Drily,]
Because they’ll certainly listen to what I have to say.
Because they’ll certainly listen to what I have to say.
I don’t want to be on the outside. I’m one of them.
[Spoken with more conviction than one might expect, but he still falters at the end, glancing down to his desk.]
Besides, if you knew what was said and moved against them, don’t you think it would be obvious who told you?
[Spoken with more conviction than one might expect, but he still falters at the end, glancing down to his desk.]
Besides, if you knew what was said and moved against them, don’t you think it would be obvious who told you?
Page 32 of 52