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[altusimperius]

tell him how pretty he is

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[altusimperius]

[Slightly on the defensive,]

...had me dance with her. Where he could see.

[bouchonne]

[ Ah. ]

While pretending he did not exist, I presume?

[altusimperius]

[Benedict nods, and sighs in that way of his: the 'I Know I'm An Idiot' sigh, without saying as much outright.]

I admit I had a vested interest in breaking them up.

[bouchonne]

Mm.

[ By seems distracted. ]

Why?

[altusimperius]

Call it a childhood crush.

[He watches Byerly's face with a tinge of curiosity.]

[bouchonne]

[ That just gets a distasteful wrinkle of the nose. ]

Awful.

[altusimperius]

Childhood crushes?

[The faintest, gentlest, most careful of ribbing. Something changed in Byerly's face, and his mind is on something else: that much is clear.]

[bouchonne]

That childhood crush.

[altusimperius]

Ah.

[He twists his mouth to one side.]

...yes.

I got over it, I think around the time he stabbed me in the hand.

[bouchonne]

Why in the Maker's name did he do that?

[ Said more with irritation than shock. Because, yeah, typical. ]

[altusimperius]

[Benedict thinks back, his eyes going distant again. Then, he shakes his head.]

I don't remember.

[That in itself is somewhat troubling, but he shrugs.]

It didn't strike me as that unusual, even at the time. Or unearned, I suppose.

[Hadn't he... yes, he had debased himself right after. A different time, a different him.]

Things can just be like that, among the Altus.

[bouchonne]

Is Tevinter high society actually even more odious than Orlesian high society? I didn't think it was possible.

[altusimperius]

Possibly. It's... different.

[He crosses his ankle over his knee, bending forward slightly to weigh in his mind how best to phrase it.]

The Game is all behind masks and closed doors, isn't it? Secrets upon secrets, she said this and he said that and maybe it's all a lie.

Tevinter society is, at.. at least as I've experienced it, rather more upfront. You may get stabbed in the heart, but you'll see who's doing it and know why, even if the reason is idiotic.

[He shrugs helplessly.]

Loki has more freedom to be reckless because he's a second son and his actions reflect less on his father's name, though I doubt anyone was happy he married an Orlesian. Dorian Pavus was excised entirely before he could truly compromise his family's status.

[bouchonne]

It happens to the best of us.

[ An arched eyebrow. ]

And you? No siblings, right?

[altusimperius]

[Bene meets his eyes and shakes his head.

No siblings.]

[bouchonne]

Such pressure, then.

[altusimperius]

[A frank nod.]

[bouchonne]

But no freedom.

[altusimperius]

I thought--

[He almost disagrees, but shakes his head.]

--freedom isn't what I thought it was, in the end.

[bouchonne]

What did you think it was?

[altusimperius]

The opposite of slavery, living your life unbound by rules or responsibilities. I thought I was free for a long time. My enclosure was designed to give me that impression.

[bouchonne]

Well, there is something to being unbound by rules.

[altusimperius]

Is anyone truly unbound by them, though? Any respectable person, at least.

[He folds his hands between his knees.]

I'm under more restrictions now than I've ever been, but I still feel freer than when I was at home.

[bouchonne]

Oh, if you're asking that question, you've never been to a real party.

[altusimperius]

[He opens his mouth as if to protest, but stops, closing it with the faintest of smirks instead.]

Maybe not.

The kids were mostly shut in a side room with a few hookahs and a keg of wine to keep us entertained. Too fucked up to remember our own names, let alone who we'd touched that night.

[He's only slightly embarrassed by this.]

That's what I would've called a real party.